How to tell the people in your life (a script)

You don't owe anyone the story. You owe yourself a sentence you can say without crying, and a follow-up you can repeat without losing your mind. Here are both.

The group chat version: 'Hey loves, I wanted to share that [Name] and I are getting divorced. It's the right call and I'm okay. I'll share more when I'm ready. For now, please just be normal with me.' Send it. Then mute the chat for 24 hours.

The parents and family version. Usually better in a phone call, not a text. 'I want to tell you something before you hear it elsewhere. [Name] and I are separating. I've thought about this for a long time and I'm sure. I'm not asking for advice right now. I'm asking for support.' That last line saves so many conversations.

When someone asks what happened: 'It's a long one. The short version is we both deserved more than what we were giving each other.' That's a complete answer. You're allowed to stop there.

When someone gets weird and overshares about their own marriage: smile, nod, redirect. You are not anyone's free therapist right now.

And when someone says the wrong thing (and someone will), assume good intent and let it go. They'll do better next time. You have bigger things to spend energy on.

Once you've sent the messages and muted the chat, the five-stage cry cycle is what to expect in the days after. And if you're still figuring out what you're even telling people, what a no-fault divorce actually looks like is the plain-language version of the thing that's happening.